Luis' posts with tag: wala lang
RULES: Each
player of this game starts off with 10 weird things/habits/little known
facts about yourself. People who get tagged need to write a blog of
their own 10 weird
things/habits/little known facts as well as state this rule clearly. At the end you need to
choose 6 people to be tagged and list their names. No tag backs.
1. I talk to myself when I am alone.
2. I watch porn everyday
3. I try to quit smoking everytime I watch porn
4. I'm usually late in most of the meetings because I go out of the house at exactly the meeting time.
5. I lie down on my bed to sleep after I take a bath
6. I hate spending 200 peso bills
7. When I listen to my favorite song, i play them over and over again without changing the song in weeks.
8. I always feel that I have some extraordinary powers
9. I always create conversational scripts so that "if" I meet the person I want to see in the mall or somewhere, I'll be ready...
10. I spend more that I can afford (credit card matters)
as demonstrated by marica during gabby's bday celeb
NO AUDIO P1170174.MOV (3.8 MB)
demonstrated by Sir Jojo and Isamu Shinozaki.. harharhar
NO AUDIO!!!! PC120003.MOV (22.6 MB)
| Your Hidden Talent |
 You are a great communicator. You have a real way with words. You're never at a loss to explain what you mean or how you feel. People find it easy to empathize with you, no matter what your situation. When you're up, you make everyone happy. But when you're down, everyone suffers. |
| Your Luck Quotient: 75% |
 You have a high luck quotient. More often than not, you've felt very lucky in your life. You may be randomly lucky, but it's probably more than that. Optimistic and open minded, you take advantage of all the luck that comes your way. |
MERRY CHRISTMAS TO EVERYONE!!!!
| Start: | Jan 8, '07 09:00a | | Location: | DLSU - Taft |
this blog is from my blogger... this is just a copy for multiply
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last night, MC and I started talking on the phone at around 11... she was extremely hyper.... she was souting and everything.... it was really fun.... she was very very funny....
but in the latter part of our conversation... there were already instances of serious topics... we really really tried to avoid it.... and then.. she was watching TV and came accross one of her favorite songs... which was someday by nina.... i tried listening to it through the phone but then decided to download it instead.... and there... i downloaded it...
i played it once and it somehow struck me... so i immediately searched for the lyrics... found some but i edited it because some words were missing or wrong... this is the real lyrics:
Someday by Nina
Someday you’re gonna realize
One day you’ll see this through my eyes
By then i wont even be there
I’ll be happy somewhere
Even if i cared
I know
You don’t really see my worth
You think your the last guy on earth
We’ll i've got news for you
I know i’m not that strong
But it won’t take long
Won’t take long
[Chorus]
cause someday, someones gonna love me
The way, i wanted you to need me
Someday,someones gonna take your place
One day i’ll forget about you
You’ll see, i wont even miss you
Someday, someday
right now
I know you can tell
I’m down,and i’m not doing well
But one day these tears
They will all run dry
I wont have to cry
Sweet goodbye
[Chorus]
cause someday, someones gonna love me
The way, i wanted you to need me
Someday,someones gonna take your place
One day i’ll forget about you
You’ll see, i won’t even miss you
Someday, I know someones gonna be there
someday, someones gonna love me
The way, i wanted you to need me
Someday,someones gonna take your place
One day i’ll forget about you
You’ll see, i won’t even miss you
Someday, someday
From the very time i read the lyrics.... we started all of the serious topics that we tried so hard to avoid.... i told her that this is the EXACT lyrics for what i'm feeling right now.... it somehow implies hope that everything will be ok someday.... we ended our conversation at around 3:30am
My realizations:
from my conversation with jove the other day.... "I love you but I have accepted the fact that you will never be mine and I will be your friend forever"
conversations with MC... "I had my set of problems and i'm still dumb at handling things that are related to life itself, and probably made a big mistake... but there is no turning back now.. I have to live on with my life."
I have to really start being myself starting now.... there are times that I feel lost like I don't know myself at all but then again... deep inside.. i know who i really am... sometimes... i just feel confused because i tend to mix the real feelings that i have and the feelings that I try very hard to show in order for the people not to notice my pain
there is a quote i got from a forwarded SMS... mc and i discussed it... the quote was " sometimes you have to put walls up, not to avoid people but to see who cares enought to break them down just be with you"
i told her that i have been doing that but she told me that i made my walls too high that i can't even see who gives effort to break them down... she told me that there always should be a watch tower behind the wall.. and i somehow forgot to place one... and yeah.. it is kind of true....
hope... it is something i don't know if i should believe or not. but maybe i was meant to be hurt.. i was really supposed to feel all this pain right now.... this song "someday" is a song full of hope... what's funny is that i have been playing this since the time i downloaded it... and then my mom asked me to pick up the food at our local diner near the house... and guess what... this song was being played there also.... somehow... fate is telling me something.. maybe for now... i will start hoping that my life won't stay like this.
Funny Shit - Banned Commercials - I Wish I Had A Condom.mpeg (8.8 MB)
Dashboard Confessional - Vindicated (Spider-Man 2) - videopimp.mpg (39.9 MB)
i love the song, i love gwen.. she's hot.. hehe.... Gwen Stefani Luxurious.mpg (31.8 MB)
Knew the signs
Wasn't right
I was stupid for a while
Swept away by you
And now i feel like a fool
So confused,
My heart's bruised
Was i ever loved by you?
Out of reach, so far
I never had your heart
Out of reach,
Couldn't see
We were never
Meant to be
Catch myself
From despair
I could drown
If i stay here
Keeping busy everyday
I know i will be ok
But i was
So confused,
My heart's bruised
Was i ever loved by you?
Out of reach, so far
I never had your heart
Out of reach,
Couldn't see
We were never
Meant to be
So much hurt,
So much pain
Takes a while
To regain
What is lost inside
And i hope that in time,
You'll be out of my mind
And i'll be over you
But now i'm
So confused,
My heart's bruised
Was i ever loved by you?
Out of reach,
So far
I never had your heart
Out of reach,
Couldn't see
We were never
Meant to be
Out of reach,
So far
You never gave your heart
In my reach, i can see
There's a life out there
For me
So there.. I tried to do what I said yesterday. I won't hide my feelings behind a mask anymore. I tried to be serious today and damn.. I cried my heart out tonight. The worst part was when I cried in front of everyone I knew. I don't know what I am supposed to feel right now. I feel a little bit humiliated. I never thought I would cry right after posing my previous blog. I never thought that I would be so emotional.
I hate my life so much. I REALLY REALLY wish I was never born!
My barkada told me that they will always be there for me... But I think it's too late for me... I just feel lost and useless already. Only one thing is gonna change my mind and I don't think it is possible. I don't have to tell anyone what it is.
I'm really sorry if I am already closed minded about this but... with all the things that I have been through since I was a child, maybe I am doing the right decision.
When I saw the comments of those people who checked out my previous blog post, all I did was cry. It really is hard for me. I somehow know that they really will be there for me whatever happens but.... there is always that "but", i can't help to be paranoid about it.
To the god who created me: Why??? What's my purpose in life. A friend told me that we were not born to immediately know what our purpose in life is. We were born to discover what it is. But I'm close to being 19 and I don't have even the slightest clue of why I exist in this world. Why is my life like this??? Why do I always feel miserable??
I'm tired of asking why since I don't seem to get any answer at all. I'm still trying my best to be strong. There is always that option of killing myself if worst comes to worst. I can't wait for that. Wish me luck!
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